Ugh...a week of Mondays?

Monday I slept in which was good, because I had nightmares on Sunday night. Two in a row actually. I blame it on the birth control pills. I was glad I had the rest of the day to just hang out with the hubby. We played Donkey Kong Country Returns, watched the Life series, and just hung out. It was really nice. Oh, and we got to take dinner to our friends who have a new set of twins.  Only one of the babies is home, so keep baby Aiden in your prayers. He had heart surgery last week and will be recovering in the hospital for a couple more weeks. His brother Braiden was so sweet! I can't wait to meet Aiden.

Tuesday I worked a full day and traveled.  One of my volunteers recently had a baby (a couple weeks from when the twins I just mentioned were born).  I got to hold the sweet pea, but I have to admit there was a little heart break...she has been diagnosed with Down syndrome. I know her family doesn't have the resources to take care of her and it just breaks my heart. She is so young, so sweet, and just deserves the best care in the world.  I so badly wanted to reach out and help, to do something, and haven't come up with anything appropriate. Just praying for now.  I also got to catch up a little with my dear friend H on the phone and my youngest sister, so there were some great parts to my day.

Wednesday I had a great meeting at work that made me think, "Wow, I'm fighting cancer!" I wish I could've bottled that feeling for today. I wish I could have saved every little ounce of that joy to remember on the harder days I have at work.  I also got to chat with my sisters and friend H (we got cut off the day before).

Today was just crappy. A co-worker was upset about something we really have no control over, which is normally the case.  Another co-worker failed to mention a meeting time change and things would have gone differently at the meeting had she told me.  Oh, and did I mention she decided to take her twin boys to the meeting? Which is not very professional.  I had to tell my supervisor about how the meeting went, which didn't make anybody happy.  I could probably have been just fine dealing with this, but then another co-worker ragged on me for how I file my documents on my computer. I don't create a file folder for a document unless I have two documents that can go into that file. Why open a folder to just see a single file when you could just see the file?  Anyway, it just hurt my feelings because I think I am good at organizing stuff like that.  Who even cares? It's just the way I chose to file my documents.  It brought back memories from another place I worked where I had a super micro-manager supervising me. I wanted to leave work early to see the family's ranch hand who is in the hospital, needless to say I didn't get to do that because I got inundated with a few requests from volunteers.  I left work just feeling crappy.  Then I got an update on the gentleman in the hospital and it wasn't good. He will probably only be with us for a day or two more.  If I had gone today he wouldn't have known I was there, but tomorrow they are taking him off some meds to say good-bye to everyone. I just want to go pay my respects for all he has done over the years for the ranch.  I feel like I owe it to the grandpa in-law.  While I was talking to my mother-in-law to get all this info, a committee member called me.  She called to tell me one of the volunteers I am really close to was diagnosed with cancer today.  It's already spread.  It's definitely not the first volunteer I have had diagnosed with cancer, but is by far one of the volunteers I am closest too! It was just a rough day. It's only been a three day work week so far and it feels like it was a three week in a row without a day off work week. I'm going in for a little while tomorrow, but I just need some time off. 

I need a Friday.

Is it nap time yet?

This week has been a whirlwind. Monday I had my ultrasound and it looked good.  I officially started my birth control pills and the path to IVF.  Monday afternoon I traveled out of town for work.  This meant a return home at 11pm.  We had a 9am staff meeting on Tuesday and I just felt like I couldn't get caught up all day, so I brought home my work. I worked until 11pm again.  Wednesday evening brought a meeting with new volunteers.  They were all so kind, so welcoming, and so willing to work! It was wonderful.  At the end of the meeting a co-worker asked me to help lift a really light box. I made it like 20 steps before having to stop.  My back hurt so bad, it felt like it was paralyzed with pain.  She took the box and we headed up to finish our meeting.  I decided when I took 3 ibuprofen and it did nothing, I should see the doctor.  I got an appointment yesterday afternoon.  I was to a point where I couldn't stand up straight I hurt so bad.  I saw a PA and she was pretty sure I had inflammation of my sciatic. She also ordered a urine test and x-rays.  My x-rays showed some degeneration, which worries me a little.  I don't have any follow up with the doctor.  For now I am just taking pain meds and a muscle relaxant.  I felt a little better today, but still not back to my self.  I have put in over 60 hours at work this week and still have work to get done by Monday. I travel again tomorrow.  I know this is temporary insanity. It will get better if I can make it through January.  After that I will have my old events transitioned and just my new work load.  Right now I feel like I am doing two jobs, but it will get better. 
This weekend we do our next step with medication for IVF. We do our antibiotics, which marks that we are about a month out from the retrieval.  It's all so exciting!

No wonder...

No wonder I felt so sleepy, achey, and generally crappy.  The time of the month came which is more exciting than usual, because it means we get to move forward with IVF! I called the doctor's office and they scheduled me for an ultrasound and labs tomorrow at 9am. If all goes well, I will start my birth control pills tomorrow too. Yay this is progress!  I'm absolutely amazed that I'm right on schedule with the calendar they gave me back in November.  I'm so excited to see what will happen in 2011!

Hello 2011

We had a lovely New Year's Eve with appetizers and games at the Mother & Father-in-laws.  New Year's Day we hung out at their place again, but this time my Brother-in-law & family joined us.  We played a few more of our new board games! I got the game Scribblish and it was pretty fun, I laughed so hard my chest hurt! We also played Quelf which has you do some RIDICULOUS things.  We laughed pretty hard at this one too.  Dicecapades was the other game we played. It was like Cranium, but not so predictable and with a few different games. We had a really good time.  I finished the evening by returning a few phone calls. 
I talked to my Aunt G for quite a while about my cousin's pregnancy.  At one point she said, "Oh honey, we shouldn't be talking about this, it's just going to make you sad." The crazy thing about this fertility journey is that while it's a quick stab in my gut when I hear someone else is pregnant, I still want to know and I'm still happy for them.  It's just that there are a lot of little things that remind me of my grief.  What might be most surprising to people is the really little things, like wanting to read the book What to Expect When Your Expecting, but don't because of not wanting to "jinx" anything or have anyone be suspicious.  The other thing is feeling like pregnant women get more perks in the workplace because they are moms.  They get fewer miles to travel to be closer to babies, breaks to pump, days to "work from home" when babysitters are ill, etc.  Working in an office that has only one male is difficult. Especially being one of the two people there who don't have kids.  Anyway, I really do enjoy talking to people about their babies, what they are doing, etc.  In some way it's me living vicariously through them.  If I don't want to talk about it, I won't ask about it. I recently joined a support group online.  Specifically, there is a group for women who are going through IVF in January and February.  One of the ladies posted this article about infertility etiquette. I choked back tears reading it, because parts of it touched so close to my heart!
In case you read the article, here are a few quirks about me...

• I don't think anyone who reads this has actually said/done these things...so thank you.
• I don't mind hearing small pregnancy complaints. Everyone listens to me complain about my journey, so it seems like fair is fair. :-) Besides, refer back to my comment about living vicariously through others. I find it all interesting.
• On the remember them on Mother's Day...that's a nice suggestion, but I beg you, please do not remember me by sending me a Mother's Day card or even saying it to me (unless I'm pregnant by then).  It's become one of the hardest days of the year.  Oh and please don't feel bad if I don't say Happy Mother's Day to you.  It's all I can do to say it to my own mother, my mother-in-law, and my sister-in-law without sobbing.

Finally, I am exhausted today.  It was all I could do to roll out of bed a little after ten.  My head aches and so does my lower back.  I pray I'm not getting sick.  The next few weeks at work are going to be crazy.  I'm so not ready to go back to work! That's the problem with vacation, is going back, ha ha.  Oh well. 

I hope you all had a fantastic New Year's Eve and Day.  When I reflected on the last decade I realized it has had some of the best years of my life and some of the very worst.  Here are my favorite moments from 2010: becoming an Aunt, sister's graduation and the following days at the lake, my friend H visiting (minus my gallbladder), seeing my friend T and going wedding dress shopping with her, the Bahamas with my hubby, and watching him open his pinball machine on Christmas. I'm looking forward to all that 2011 may offer! Happy New Year!

Happy Holidays

I feel the need to update the world (this isn't a public blog, but I feel like the people who read it are my world, ha ha).  We have had a really nice break so far.  My last day of working for the year was the 22nd which was much needed because I was sick to my stomach.  I think I caught a flu bug which resulted in my getting sick and having to stay close to home for a few days.  In my half day of work on the 22nd I did manage to get my new office rearranged.  I am still in the same office, but I switched sides and moved the desk around.  For the past two years my back or side have been to the door. This makes me super uncomfortable and affords me little privacy.  I'd had enough and decided to take apart my desk, move it, and screw it back together.  Mission accomplished.  My new office mate starts the 3rd of January and I am so excited to work with her! She is an amazing person and should be a fantastic addition to my work environment.

Christmas Day we woke up and opened gifts.  My dear husband got me a beautiful charm bracelet from Kay Jewelers. It's like a Pandora bracelet, but 100% Sterling Silver and made in Italy.  I got an awesome zip up hoodie to show off my Gonzaga pride from my sister.  I also got a Lane Bryant gift card, Avon, and a cute white zip up cardigan from my mom.  Oh and I got Donkey Kong County Returns for the Wii from Jason.  My dad sent me an electric ball that shocks you when you play with it and the Create a Critter Cricut Cartridge. Jason got the Playstation Move, the new Rascal Flatts CD, a new board game, a nice polo, and Playstation Create.  After opening some fabulous gifts we went over to my brother & sister-in-law's house.  It was the nieces first Christmas and she was so much fun.  Her Uncle J even held her for the first time! It melted my heart and was one of the best gifts of the day! This was the first baby he has ever held, I was so fortunate to be there for the experience.  The hubby opened his BIG gift here, a pinball machine! It's a fixer upper, but is in pretty good shape.  I opened a plethora of board games and the Cricut 50 States cartridge.  We had an awesome dinner with prime rib, turkey, funeral potatoes, sweet potatoes, cherry pie, fudge, sauteed mushrooms, fruit salad, and dinner rolls. The whole day was really nice.

The  day after Christmas we did some shopping.  Our big buy was a bunch of storage containers for organizing the storage room and putting away our new Christmas tree. I also got a few supplies to make more cards and one more Cricut Cartridge made just for creating cards.

The 27th the dear hubby and his brother worked on the pinball machine all day while I made cards all day.  I got 16 cards knocked out and he got a lot figured out on the machine (I don't know all the technical stuff).  The 28th we did more of the same! Seriously, from 9-6 two days in a row we just relaxed tinkering with our favorite hobbies.  It has been amazing and makes me want to put more and more money toward retirement. Maybe I can retire at 35? Okay, maybe not, but 50 would rock.  Especially if this is how we filled our days. 

Today was date day! We woke up to snow!  We hadn't really had any snow this year. We had one day where there was a dusting, that was it.  As of today we have INCHES of snow. It's not feet, but it's progress! I was sort of peeved to see they closed our office, there wasn't THAT much snow.  I want to know who made that decision, because it's ridiculous. Especially because there was only one person working so we could have our office open.  She lives really close to the office too and we were able to drive all the way to another town and back today. The roads were fine and the weather was snowy, but not like a blizzard or anything! Anyway, now that I have vented that, we drove to another town to watch the movie How Do You Know and enjoyed a late lunch at Rock Bottom Brewery.  The movie was cute and our lunch was really good.  The first time we had Rock Bottom we were not impressed, my dear friends T and T really love it though, so I've gone back a few times and now I think it's so yummy.  After lunch we swung by JoAnn Fabric and Crafts to get a few more card making supplies (I had run out after my two day marathon of card making).

Tomorrow...I have no idea what we will do, probably more messing around with hobbies. We have zero plans for New Year's Eve which is semi-depressing! We are thinking about doing fondue, playing games, and watching the ball drop on TV. So far it will just be the two of us.  There just doesn't seem to be a lot going on this year.  New Year's Day we are going out to the Mother and Father-in-law's for a salad bar and hopefully games.  Should be nice.  Hope you are all doing well!

Cookielicious

I blame it on the lack of snow.  The need to make cookies that look like snow balls that is.  This will be my first Christmas ever without snow on the ground.  That is if the weather man is correct and our weather stays in the 40's-60's for the next week with little to no precipitation.  Anyway, we went to a Christmas party last night and were invited to bring a snack to share.  I also knew I'd be a part of a cookie exchange tonight and we are hosting a Christmas party tomorrow.  Making a big batch of cookies seemed like the thing to do! So I doubled the recipe below and made two double batches.  I came out with about 150 cookies.  They were traditional Mexican Wedding Cake Cookies from my Taste of Home cookbook.  They turned out delicious!

1/2 Cup Powdered Sugar, plus extra for dusting

1 Cup Butter, softened

1/2 tsp vanilla or almond extract

1/2 Cup finely chopped pecans

2 Cups flour

Preheat oven to 325 degrees.  Whip sugar, butter, and extract until light and fluffy.  Slowly add flour.  Stir in pecans.  Create 1 1/2 inch balls of dough and set on a greased cookie sheet.  Bake 12-15 minutes.  Let cool on wire cooling rack for 4-5 minutes.  Roll in powdered sugar.  Let cool completely.  If powdered sugar soaks into the cookie, they were too warm.  Redust the cookies in that case.  Enjoy!

CCC...Christmas Card Crafting

 This evening I went to a cookie exchange and happened to learn how to make little boxes out of used Christmas cards!  The person who made the boxes used them to store pieces of hard candy.  She cut some pieces of tissue paper down and folded them inside the boxes before adding the treats.  Anyway, I thought the idea was so cute and so easy that I would share.  It was really fun and I hope I get some more Christmas cards to play with! 

Step 1.  Start with your basic Christmas card.

Step 2. Cut in half.

Step 3. Take the back side of the card that has the sentiment and fold in half long ways.

Step 4.  Fold the same piece in half the other way.

Step 5. Fold each side in half to meet in the middle.  The side should meet at your original fold.

Step 6.  Unfold the flaps. Turn the card and fold the other edges together to make creases just like you did in step 5.

Step 7. Unfold.  At this point you have several creases in your card.

Step 8.  Place the folded card half on top of the front of the card. Using the creases as a guide to make 4 small cuts.  On each end you will just snip the farthest two sides to the closest crease.

Step 9.  You can see the four completed snips that went through both layers.

Step 10. This is where your box starts to take shape. Lift up two of your cut flaps and hold together.

Step 11. Holding down the edge of the box, prepare to fold the remaining piece over to form an edge.

Step 12.  Secure the folded piece and new edge with a piece of tape.

Step 13.  Repeat on other side.  You have now complete the bottom of your box.

Step 14.  To create the top of the box, repeat steps 10-13, creasing to create the lines in the top.  For best results be generous with the top half of the box.  The box will be a tight fit together.

Step 15. Voila, a cute little box made out of a recycled Christmas card!

Here are a few different boxes that we made.  It's really fun to see how the various art work on the cards turns out to make a fun, new box!  We made a couple out of non- Christmas cards and those turned out cute too.  Sometimes the wording lands just right.  Enjoy making this fun, new, craft!